What a crappy day! Ever have one of those or three or five in a row? This week has been crap…
I’ve officially made it to Friday, let’s look back and see how the last couple days have got me to where I’m at today. Wednesday my daughter came in to visit from Pennsylvania and it was her 18th birthday. Normally I really look forward to seeing her, but this time I just felt really reserved. I’m not sure why, but we have had some rough patches after she decided to go live with her dad four years ago. That in itself is a long story, but to sum it all up she went to years of counseling after her dad and I divorced. Her dad put so much pressure on her (not her sister) to move in with him and his girlfriend (who eventually becomes his wife). Job and Family services was contacted after numerous visits to the doctor and she was coming home with Urinary Tract Infections, to find out his wife was making her and my younger daughter use Summer’s Eve douch. What the hell? This was years ago, but he took me to court in 2008 the day before school started and she told the judge she wanted to live with him. The kicker is he didn’t want his other daughter, just my oldest. She wouldn’t have moved there anyway, but can you imagine what that does to a child? Anyways, years pass and my oldest that lives 300 miles away is out every night with friends, talking to boys inappropriately through text messages and her dad and step-mom are ok with it….
She gets here on her birthday, but decides that she wants to stay at a hotel with her step-mom (because her step-mom is driving to Indy to see her family). It’s not like I could tell her no and her sister wanted to stay with her, so that was my Wednesday. Thursday I was at the University of Michigan having the nerves in the right side of my neck cauterized hoping to lessen my 3-5 migraines a week. It was incredibly painful and I am very sore. Time spent with my daughter since she’s been here? Maybe 2 hours. There is just this huge disconnect between us and she is into her phone and texting more than anything else.
Friday comes and I have a horrible migraine from the procedure from the following day, my daughters decide they want to go shopping with each other (not me). I was fine with that, because they need time to spend together (my feelings were hurt though). Ashlynn (my oldest) asks me, “Mom you know that $600 that we got from the car accident you were in? Well can I take that money out now that I’m 18?” I told her that she could and that is what she did, took all of it out and spent over $300 today. Unbelievable! I don’t know, she’s just not the girl that I raised for 14 years. I love her to death, but she has changed so much since living with her dad. Did I mention that her dad only wanted her, because my youngest daughter looks too much like me?
Then we went out to dinner and I guess I forgot to mention this, because this was yesterday. It was just me and my two daughters, which was kind of nice. We are sitting there and Ashlynn is talking about boys and Gabby starts talking about work (she works with my husband). Somehow they both get on the topic of flirting at work, because Ashlynn works at Taco Bell in PA. Gabby told her that she doesn’t flirt at work, because there are no guys there, but the adults flirt with each other. I say to her, “So Ryan is flirting at work?” She says, “Ummm yea, but it’s just work flirting mom, it’s not like it means anything.” It does mean something to me… He works with all women and one man. They are all pretty much a lot younger than him, so it does bother me. Of course my daughters thought I was over reacting to the whole conversation, but that is not something that I do. Whether I’m at school or when I was waitressing, I didn’t flirt with people. Part of the reason I stopped waitressing was because of all the soap opera drama going on in the kitchen.
I guess I also failed to mention that today I wasn’t supposed to drive because of my procedure yesterday and my friend Chris had to take me. If anyone has read some of my previous blogs Chris is the guy that has been my best friend for over 5 years, but I feel like he spends time with me for all the wrong reasons. We used to have so much fun together, but since I’ve gotten married 3 years ago, he always wants to step over his boundaries as a friend. I have had numerous discussions with him about this and he just kind of laughs and says sorry. Today on the way back from my appointment with my son in the back seat, he decides he is going to put his hands on me. I’m like seriously? I’m on medication that makes me incredibly tired and out of it and he is of course trying to take advantage of the situation. He stopped, but it’s almost like he likes it when I say, “no.” I have also told my husband about these things and it doesn’t bother him. Or if it does he hasn’t said anything to make me feel like it does. He laughs about it and says, “well we both know that Chris is in love with you.” Great, but do you think that he should act like that? I don’t flirt with him and I don’t feel like I lead him on… It’s such a sticky situation because my kids are friends with his daughter and I am friends with his family…
Then there’s the weight loss portion of my blog: I get weighed yesterday for my procedure and it says 149 and I’m like “OMG I haven’t weighed that in over a year.” So happy and can’t believe it, figured it’s probably off by a few pounds, but then today at my appointment for my headache, they weigh me and it says 169… Really? Do you have to kick a girl when she is down?
Happy Easter everyone and try not to over indulge with the good food this weekend.